16th Design [curse post]

[threadthefire]

Cinna
Designer of a revolution.
Visionary and friend.

He gave life to the fire that burned within us all.

Comments

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

She does. Even when I end up having to set them by shoving her into a tree.

[MOVING ON...]

How much does she have?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

The government's oppressive, dangerous. The Games aren't Games in the sense that her world would think of a game, and there's something very... dangerous that we're keeping secret from not only her, but even Rue, Peeta and Katniss.

[He takes a deep breath, knowing that a fair amount of that might be his fault. But it's increasingly difficult for him to lie to her.]

...she asked me if I've killed anyone, Finnick, which was more a result of a comment I made, but the point remains. She knows a fair amount, and is guessing at the rest. And I worry about the content those guesses.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

I know I gave her the full name, the Hunger Games. It was when I was fourteen. She's asked me about the Capitol before, too. And I know she's seen me with my trident.

[And now it's his turn to let out a slow breath.]

The pieces were all there, if she wanted to put them together. We've all mentioned the Games before, but only four of us ever say we were in them, and only three call ourselves Victors. [A pause.] And the only one who doesn't call herself a Victor also happens to be dead. It's there for anyone who looks closely enough. We've just been lucky that not many people bother to look.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

She's starting to look, and frankly I think it would be better for someone to tell her in advance.

Show her that much respect for the... friendship she's given us. [Was that a stumble, yes, but it serves to highlight the fact that Cinna's close enough to worry about something slipping and pushing her away.]

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

You've heard her talk about her world before, haven't you? Her government? The way they treat their citizens?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

...some. We don't talk about the government much. What little I've heard... I'm a bit envious.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

She's explained it to me before. She works in their capitol. The government exists to protect its people and make their lives better.

How do you explain the Games to someone with that kind of expectation?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

Carefully I imagine.

Finnick... [He sighs.] I don't want to lie to her. And I don't want her to feel like she can't ask me about my life.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

I know. I get that.

The part that makes it hard is that it's more than just your life she'll be learning about.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

...I know, which is why I'm talking to you. It affects all of us, but you most of all. I know you're close to her.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

And you know how I feel about secrets.

How much do you want to tell her?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

[His hesitation is only slight. He's been thinking about this a lot, after all.] She needs to know about the Games. I'm worried that a curse will come along and replicate them again. Or worse, make one of you think you're still in them. With the Games would probably come an explanation of why they're so significant to us, why and how they came about. I've been reading a little about their ancient Romans - there's precedent in her own culture for those sorts of things.

From that she will likely extrapolate the rest, but I don't intend to give her any specifics on your, Rue's, Katniss' or Peeta's lives. I'll tell her my part... and that I made quite the impression with some of my designs that haven't impressed Snow and his regime. I doubt after that, she'll ask any more.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

And how much are you going to tell her about the Capitol?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

I doubt I'll need to tell her much. Any government that enforces something like the Games... I doubt I'll need to elaborate much.

Is there something in specific you're worried about?

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

No. Nothing in particular.

Give me a day or two to think about it, at least?

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

Please. I won't do anything without talking to Katniss, Peeta and Rue. [He pauses, sighing heavily.] I half-wonder why I'm bothering. The odds of either of us being here long-term... well, longer-term...

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

It's been seven months for me now. Eight for you, right?

It's weird to be away for so long. And tempting to just...settle in here. Bad as it can get around here, it's got its definite perks over home.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

Eight... today actually.

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

It was seven for me last Saturday.

And next month it's a year for Katniss and Peeta.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

So long...

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

Yeah.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

Do you wonder... if we're ever going to make it back?

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[protects-her.livejournal.com]

No. Mostly I just wonder how long this will last.

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[threadthefire.livejournal.com]

As do I.